Life will get better when you accept everything

    Setelah berfikir lama untuk memutuskan gue pulang atau tidak di tahun baru kali ini, akhirnya gue memutuskan untuk pulang. I spent time about 2 weeks there, and know what?. Momen kemarin jadi momen paling peaceful semenjak gue pulang ke rumah di perkuliahan. Kok bisa? setelah gue merasakan berat hati hanya untuk pulang. Yeahh, cuz before I went home, I tried to accept everything.

 

    Gue mencoba untuk menerima apapun yang bukan atas kendali gue. Kayak, gue mulai nyoba untuk menerima bagaimana cara orang tua gue menyayangi anak-anaknya, meskipun kadang kurang baik. Gue mulai nerima gimana keadaan kakak-kakak gue yang belum bisa menuhin ekspektasi. I tried to eccept the bad and good situation in my house. Cuz sometimes, problems do exist and we cannot solve them. We just need to accept that we are living in that situation.

    Terkadang keadaan rumah bukan jadi alasan kenapa kita gak mau pulang, tapi karena kita tidak menyukai versi diri kita sendiri ketika di rumah. And yeaah, I don't like the fragile, angry, sensitive version of myself. Tapi ketika gue diperjalanan pulang. Gue nemu quote yang berisi, “If something triggered you, remember that's actually not your problem”. So I realized, sometimes I get angry over what's not really my problem. When I start to feel that anger again, I choose to stay away and control my emotions.

    When I don't get what I expect from my parents or my siblings, gue selalu menyalahkan mereka. But if I keep getting stuck in those feelings of hate, anger, and disappointment.Gue akan tetep stuck and I will not move on. So, gue memilih untuk berdamai dengan keadaan.  I try to accept that my family may not be perfect. So instead of continuing to blame others and not accepting the reality of my life, I chose to accept it. Karena pada kenyataannya kita tidak punya kendali atas apa yang orang lain lakukan dan apa yang terjadi di hidup kita. So, what we need to change is just our perspective.

"It's not necessarily the circumstances or the people that make me depressed or angry, instead it is my own perception of the people." - Haenim Sunim